Taravalia – The Queen of Ferelden watched from the shadows as her husband, Alistair Theirin – King of Ferelden snuck one of his many whores into his bedchamber to have a merry night with. In public by all appearances we’re a happy married couple, in private this was not the case.
How could our marriage have gone so horribly wrong? Alistair had changed after that night with Morrigan.
Had he ever loved me?
Morrigan’s ritual had worked but at great cost; the price that I would have to pay for my life. The price demanded of me would be the loss of the King’s love, if I had ever had it at all.
Did Alistair use me to gain all that Cailan once had as the King of Ferelden? Had Alistair always coveted what Cailan had by being the legal heir and Alistair the bastard son? Did Alistair set his plan in motion once Cailan fell on the battlefield or when Arl Eamon decided to put Alistair forth as King? The grand bards in Orlais would have been proud of his performance.
The future Queen of Ferelden had discovered that Alistair had truly wished to marry Anora. Zevran had followed Alistair after he had left the dining hall where all of us had gathered after the Landsmeet, where Alistair had tried to jolt me, and he had visited Anora. Anora died during her fake imprisonment. I had seen to this myself, pouring the poison down Anora’s throat because of her order of killing my parents. I had personally seen to it the ice queen was truly dead and gone by my own hand.
Howe had turned on Anora and it was me that rescued the woman who ordered Howe’s massacre of my family. Anora had known if Cailan died at Ostagar, she wouldn’t hold her throne with my father still alive, because my father would never have supported Loghain’s daughter to remain as Queen. My parents had known of Loghain’s affair with Queen Rowan and the real reason Maric allowed Cailan to marry Anora. Loghain had blackmailed Maric for years and virtually taken control of the Kingdom with Maric as a figure-head only. Loghain had used his affair with Rowan and Maric’s own affairs with two elves to bend Maric to his will, one affair which had produced Alistair. My parents had always wondered if Loghain had a hand in King Maric’s disappearance, they had never found any proof.
Maric had once considered me for marriage to Prince Cailan. My father would never allow the marriage even though my mother would have been overjoyed. My father never wanted me near Loghain at court. This is also why father had encouraged Fergus’ marriage to Oriana since she was from Antiva. My parents never trusted Loghain.
This was also the very reason I asked to speak with Loghain at Ostagar to let him know that I knew what was going on. Cailan also realized something was in the wind and this is why he sent Alistair and me to the Tower of Ishal once I showed up at Ostagar with Duncan. Looking back I knew that my father had known something was up when he sent Fergus ahead. My father was sending my brother off to battle but knew he could hold his own. Fergus being the heir to Highever, and me to be the captain of the garrison under Fergus’ command with me as his bodyguard.
Anora would have killed Alistair if he had married her, once I was out of the picture. Anora had gotten to Alistair just like she had tried to use me against him. Unlike my beloved betrothed I didn’t fall for her tricks. I had always known what Loghain and Anora had been about and their plans for the kingdom because of my parents.
My father had fought with Maric during the Orleasian occupation and knew that Maric had slept with the two elves and he had seen Loghain with Rowan. My father had come upon Rowan and Loghain by accident. The Landsmeet would never have voted for Alistair nor Anora to take the throne if my father had voiced his opinion at the Landsmeet, when Cailan died at Ostagar. The Landsmeet would have voted my father to the throne and this is why we all had to die.
Anora knew that my father hadn’t joined the battle in the south since Highever was a great distance away from Ostagar and my father would have stopped in Denerim to stock up on supplies for his knights and the Highever garrison before heading to Ostagar. Anora had sent Howe to stop my father from ever joining the battle and to murder all of us instead.
When I returned to the palace after doing my duty, I had been shocked to discover upon my return from Amaranthine that I would no longer share my husband’s bedchamber unless he desired for me to do so. No longer did I hear the sweet endearments of ‘my love or dear wife’.
I’d known that something was wrong when Alistair wanted me to take command of the Wardens in Amaranthine. This was not my choice but my husband’s. As his subject I had agreed and done what he had asked. As his wife I resented my command of the Vigil. Of course there had been Alistair’s temper tantrum over Amaranthine burning which had been my decision. I’d had no choice, the city had to burn to stop the spread of the darkspawn taint. As a Grey Warden, Alistair should have realized the city had to burn due to the darkspawn taint within. The people already infected, the captain of Amaranthine’s garrison had informed me of the conditions within the city. My husband had learned to be politically savvy since I had been gone or had he always been? We’d had a terrible argument at the Vigil once I had returned from killing the Mother.
It had always bothered me that my husband had shown up just after the battle when I first took my command of the Vigil and he had been closely behind me on the road as I arrived at the Vigil for the very first time. I could never believe that my husband sent me off with just one guide and no guards. He even kept my beloved Mabari war hound behind to sire puppies. I’d been truly on my own. I was the bloody Queen of Ferelden, one guard for my protection was all my husband had allotted me. I’d never liked the fact the Chantry had taken over the protection of my husband. The Grand Cleric had too much sway over Alistair. Where was the Chantry when King Cailan died on the battlefield at Ostagar and the Templars?
Alistair could have requested a different Warden Commander from Weisshaupt and he had chosen his wife instead. Then I had run into Wynne in Amaranthine with her stating that she was too busy to visit a former companion and visit the Queen of Ferelden?
Wynne had been sent to check on me, to verify if I was pregnant or not before the assassination attempts on my life began. I had not been fooled. Wynne was the one that had been hoodwinked. Morrigan had left me a spell of illusion that Anders had cast on me to hide my pregnancy. Wynne had known what Alistair’s activities had been, and she didn’t want to visit in fear she would let something slip regarding his activities of which I was fully aware.
Six months into our marriage everything started to change. I’d felt the shift from loving husband to someone I no longer knew or understood. The honeymoon was over when I was shipped off to Amaranthine.
Had my own husband been involved in the plot against me and the assassination attempts on my life in Amaranthine? Given his current behavior the odds were in favor of it being so and this cut to the heart of the matter of my current situation, if all went well I would soon bring an end to my suffering.
Soon my dear husband you will stand on your own two feet or die trying, for your queen won’t be here to keep everything nice and tidy while you whore and drink your time away. You will have to stand up and be the King you were born to be or slink away in the night with just your life. Just as your father had once run for his own life, and unlike those men who killed your grandmother, I will not kill Maric’s son nor betray the people of Ferelden in such a manner, as Loghain had done. You will be given a chance to prove your worth. You will decide your own fate and destiny once and for all.
In two days time my husband would leave for Orlais to finish up and sign the official trade agreements with Empress Celene that both countries would need to recover from the cost of war to both countries and especially to Ferelden.
What my husband didn’t know was that I the Queen of Ferelden will also be in Orlais to sign the final document that would be delivered to the King upon his return. We would be free of each other once and for all. Even the Landsmeet wouldn’t be able to stop me from my decisions. The Divine had agreed once proof was given to her on the King’s treatment of his Queen and I was also barren and it was best for the Country of Ferelden if our marriage was terminated. I was not as barren as everyone had been led to believe. Nobody need know that except for my brother and a few trusted friends.
I couldn’t take the last five years of misery any longer and I had gone to my brother and we had reached these hard decisions together, once the assassination attempt had been made on Fergus’ life and mine. We’d purchased an estate in the Free Marches, we would become merchants. If the Dryden’s could do it, then why not the Couslands? We choose to give our loyalty to ourselves and the causes that we feel to be true and just. We would stand for the true principles that we had been taught by our parents.
I’m going to strike a blow that Alistair and may others will never see coming. Does he honestly think my love for him will allow me to continue on in this manner? He was ever the fool as Morrigan always claimed that he was and she had been right.
Fergus has a surprise for the King as well. The Cousland Family will be leaving Ferelden and giving up our Terynir for good to start our lives over; I would also be leaving the Terynir of Gwaren. Once my brother learned of the treatment of his sister at her husband’s hands, a husband that she’d had bled all over Ferelden for, it was time for a change. Fergus and I hoped that our parents and the generations of Couslands would understand and their spirits would approve. Both Teyrnirs’ had been sold, one to the Arl of Redcliffe, Arl Teagan. The other to Arl Wolf of South Reach. The transfer of gold for payment would be sent through the Grey Wardens from the Vigil.
I also had the approval of the First Warden. I would be taking command of the Wardens in the Free Marches and Rivain as second-in-command to the First Warden. I turned in the shadows and returned to the royal apartments of the Queen.
A few days later the day dawned bright and sunny as the King and Queen made their way to the docks for the King’s official farewell as he started on his journey to bring everlasting peace between the war-torn and blighted countries of Ferelden and Orlais or so he thought. Empress Celene had agreed to the deal with the Queen of Ferelden to draw the King away from Ferelden for her own selfish reason which the Queen of Ferelden was sure about. Leliana had been very busy on her return trip to Orlais. Alistair also believed that Leliana was gone for good. When Alistair tried to proposition Leliana, after our marriage, this sealed the deal with Leliana. Even a master bard from Orlais had her limits.
“Lords and Ladies of Ferelden, I as your King will go forth to sign the agreement that will bring everlasting peace to our great nation and once again open up trade with Orlais.”
“The peace that my brother, your beloved monarch King Cailan wished and desired for his country, once the blight was ended. I leave my beloved Lady Wife Your Queen in command of this great nation of ours, do her bidding as you would do mine.”
I almost laughed, my husband had just given his subjects his permission to follow his wife. I’ll bet Morrigan is laughing her arse off wherever she is watching from.
Alistair grabbed me by the shoulders and kissed me passionately in front of all of Denerim. I nearly gagged as his mouth invaded mine. Alistair gripped my shoulders in warning. He plundered my mouth with his tongue. A tongue that still bore the odor and taste of the whore who had just left his bed early that morning. For those assembled it appeared that the King was kissing his wife goodbye and he couldn’t wait to return to her side. I had no choice but to submit to my husband in front of everyone in Denerim seeing the King off on his journey. If he had done this in private I would have slapped the fire out of his face and he would have proceeded to take what was his by right, since he had done it before.
Once he ended the kiss with his once beloved smirk, it was time for me to play my part.
“My Lord and King, I will pray to the Maker for your safe journey and your safe return to my side.” The King bowed to his wife and I curtsied to him.
The crowd had gone wild at the King and Queen’s parting words to each other. Alistair walked down the plank and boarded the royal ship that would take him to Orlais. The whore that had left his bed early that morning was already on board and naked in his bed waiting for him. Which Zevran had confirmed for me as he had watched from the shadows as the whore had left the palace and boarded Alistair’s ship before dawn had broken.
What Alistair didn’t know was that Sten’s own convoy of ships was resting just around the bend back toward the shores off of the Brecilian Forest and by nightfall his ships would dock in Denerim awaiting the passengers he had been asked and agreed to provide safe passage for, those that would be boarding his ships tonight.
For the last several months many had boarded his ships and were already preparing the estate and the new warden command post. People who wished to follow the Hero of Ferelden had been leaving Ferelden little by little, with Sten ferrying these people to their new lives. Thus a debt of honor would soon be repaid in full along with a lifetime supply of cookies and of course recipes on how to make them. The King had left his wife alone one too many nights and she had arranged for the events to unfold in the coming days that would change Ferelden forever.
I returned to my carriage to be taken back to the palace once the King’s ship was no longer visible on the horizon, which was custom. My last official duty done for Ferelden I returned to the palace to wait for darkness to fall. I would spend my time in my study which wasn’t unusual for me.
Darkness came and in the middle of the night, I slipped out into the royal gardens in my black tinted armor that I had found in Amaranthine. My famous swords strapped to my back, and my Mabari war hound at my side. I turned and looked back at the palace where Teagan would be in control come morning, I had left him as Regent until Alistair returned.
One black-haired elf was tucked in nice and cozy in my bed at the palace giving the impression that the Queen was indeed safe in her bed when Alistair’s spies made sure every night that she remained faithful to him and him alone. I had gotten the message loud and clear when I had come upon the hanging for adultery in Amaranthine.
Arl Eamon would not be returning to Ferelden with his King. No, poor man, he would ingest a deadly poison aboard ship once Alistair’s ship started its return journey to Ferelden. It would appear that the old Arl would die in his sleep from natural causes. With luck Isolde would return to Orlais, never to bother or harm the people of Redcliffe again with her stupidity.
I had mixed the potent wine colored poison and the elf servant who would administer the poison would secure the future of his wife, son, and daughter with the Queen of Ferelden in my service. He would follow once he got the chance to slip away. I had Isabella’s word on his safe passage. My own brand of justice. That I demanded from the old Arl for helping the King betray his wife. The elf servant would also administrator the poison to Alistair’s whore when they returned to the palace. Oh, the scandal that would cause. The King will awaken to find his whore dead in his bed. Pity, I wouldn’t be there to see that happen.
I had done much for the old Arl. I had saved his life, and that of his son and wife and he had also betrayed me; conspiring with Bann Esmerelle in her assassination attempt of the Queen of Ferelden and Warden Commander of Ferelden. Zevran had cleaned up that mess once I killed the traitors at their meeting place on the old farm hold. Zevran had been dispatched to kill the Bann and had uncovered Arl Eamon’s instructions in a hidden room within the Bann’s bedchambers. As far as Alistair had known, Zevran had left the country four years ago. This had not been true however. The Vigil had many hidden places of refuge, so did Highever.
As for Alistair, he could whore until his death, but no seed of his would ever spring forth from his loins. No, the Queen of Ferelden had seen to that as well. My husband wasn’t as infertile as he had first thought. Alistair drank a potion with his dinner the night before he sailed to Orlais, that allowed his seed to die once and for all and it wasn’t due to the taint. His own wife had served it to him, ensuring that Empress Celene would never gain hold of Ferelden through Alistair and her plans to draw the King into her bed. The King would enjoy himself but that would be all that would happen. Oh how I wanted to laugh.
As far as the King was concerned my good friend Anders and the new First Enchanter of the Circle whose name is Petra assured the King they were doing all that they could to cure him of the taint to produce a child for Ferelden, which was never going to happen. As far as the Queen was concerned Alistair could screw himself to death begetting that heir.
The Maker had smiled down on me when Wynne and Irving both had died before this all came about, Wynne wouldn’t be here when her ‘Golden Boy’ paid for his crimes against his own Queen. It had been hard to believe that Wynne had actually drunk that bottle of wine and died. A bottle of wine full of poison delivered as a gift from the Queen of Ferelden. Leliana retrieving the bottle and destroying the proof just as Wynne died. Thanks to Anders fine selection of mage robes and Cullen allowing Leliana access to the tower.
Orta in Orzammar and her noble house along with the Legion of the Dead and the House of Dace would also correct a wrong that I’d done to the people of Orzammar. A deal had been struck and King Behlen would also not live long in his complicity in the near murders of the House of Dace heirs and the Queen of Ferelden. Behlen would be dead before dawn broke the morning skies. The stone over Behlen’s head wouldn’t protect him.
I had nearly died in Amgarrark over that assassination attempt, nearly losing my life that horrific night battling the Harvester. Amgarrark had been destroyed once and for all with the help of Dworkin and his students and their lyrium explosives. I had not gone alone as Behlen assumed. Behlen had offered Alistair a fine suit of armor for his betrayal. Oghren, Nathaniel, and Anders had been following close behind. There was more than one way to get into the deep roads other than through Orzammar.
Shale’s disappearance still bothered me. If the stone golem was still alive I hoped with the control rod that the female golem would find me. I prayed that the golem I had fought in Amgarrark had not been Shale.
The Shaperte in Orzammar, once he had been told of what had transpired in Amgarrark agreed to destroy Caridin’s Research forever. Traces of Caridin’s research had been wiped out of the memories; Oghren witnessed the burning of the research himself. Hopefully the evilness within had been destroyed once and for all. With Leliana’s help bards had been dispatched from Orlais to try to track down the Trevinter Mage who had come to Amgarrark to create the Harvester and with luck they would find and destroy any magical research that might be traceable. It was the best that I could hope for.
In the back of my mind I had already figured out it had been Wynne who had been one of the mages conducting the research even though I had never said. Wynne had taken part in this assassination attempt, somehow she had gotten out of Amgarrark before the horrors within took place. Wynne had once escaped the battle at Ostagar all those years ago, how she had done this nobody had ever had known.
Whatever Wynne’s reasons she had made sure that I never conceived a child with Alistair during our journeys of ending of the blight or so she thought. Zevran had seen her mix the herbs and place them in my wine bottle near my bedroll. Had it been by Alistair’s order? This was something I would never know and didn’t care to know. Once I returned to the palace to my husband and duties as Queen I had seen to it that I had a different healer from the circle. My husband had not been pleased; but, I really didn’t care for his opinions by that point.
I had sent Wynne back to the circle and away from court under the guise of Wynne doing research to find a cure for my husband and myself to produce an heir. If Wynne’s plans had come to fruition, she was going to see to it that I never bore that heir. For some unknown reason Wynne had hidden memories and hatred for the Cousland Family. She had never realized that the amulet of memories that I had given her long ago had revealed this. She had uttered these things in her sleep. Zevran had overheard her mumbling. Zevran had been right, some people needed to be killed.
I thought of all of these things as I made my way through the royal gardens to make my way to the wall with the hidden passage that my husband used to make his exits on many nights, to visit his whores that were scattered throughout Denerim.
Goldana even, sister indeed, as if I had ever believed that lie of Alistair’s. Goldana’s bastard son with Alistair had also been killed. Two clean shots, one from an Antivan assassins bow, and the other shot from an Orlesian Master Bard had found their marks true just as the King boarded his ship. Captain Kylon looking the other way when the child had been killed. Which for me had been a hard order to give. The child my own dog had brought to show me. The Queen knew many things about her husband and his heritage, Alistair had no true sister. Thanks to the records that I had uncovered of Duncan’s from the Denerim compound before I had left for the Vigil. All of the King’s whores throughout Denerim would never see the light of morning. Many wrongs of the past would be corrected this night.
Templars on guard at the Denerim Chantry were so easy to get drunk on duty from their boredom. Leliana had been able to piece together a lot of Alistair’s history at the Chantry and how he would sneak out at night and visit the many whores around town. Alistair had at least told the truth about not being very religious. A red-haired Chantry sister had discovered many things that went on behind the scenes at Denerim’s Chantry. The Grand Cleric of Denerim would also not live long once the Queen of Ferelden left the country for her part in setting the Queen up in Amaranthine, using Anders in that plot. The Blackstone Irregulars and the Mage’s Collective would see to this on my behalf. The Mage’s Collective had a bone to pick with the Grand Cleric, to the Queen’s delight.
I turned one last time before slipping through the hidden gate viewing everything I had nearly died trying to preserve. With one last look I turned and slipped away.
Passing through the gate, I slowly made my way to the docks, keeping to the shadows. Finally I came to the Qunari war ship. The Commander of the vessel stood ever vigilant and stoic as he waited for my arrival. Watching from the shadows for the signal which was finally given I stepped forth to greet my old companion.
“Are you ready Kadan to seek the path that you have chosen? The Qun demands your answer before I allow you to board my ship.”
Taravalia looked forward to Sten’s ship and saw those that had already boarded. There stood Oghren with Felsi, and their little nugget. Alistair had been cruel to Oghren using his pride against him in a drinking game goading the Orzammar warrior to become a Grey Warden and ripping Oghren’s family apart. Oghren had tried to find his place in a new world becoming a general in Denerim’s guard, which for some reason Alistair could never stand. Alistair had gotten even for being called a pike twirler.
I saw Sigrun who had gone into the deep roads to end her life too early; I’d sent Zevran to stop her. Zevran revealing the Queen’s future plans to her. She was a fine warrior and smart as a whip. Sigrun would be needed with the Wardens in Rivain. Velanna would make the trip as our healing mage, and become the keeper of the elves coming with me, as well as being a Grey Warden. Velanna’s life also destroyed losing her clan and sister. Anders was along for the ride to see me safely away; he would return to help Nate command the Grey Wardens, they would be the only ones in Ferelden who knew where I had gone. Justice had already dropped dead in Kristoff’s body. Whatever had happened to the spirit nobody knew for sure. Zevran with Mithras his new love interest – a Dalish elf, which had surprised me; I was so happy for Zevran. There was Leliana with her new bard lady friend, whom she had met in Orlais when she returned to take care of Marjolean. The new bard having beautiful honey colored hair and deep green eyes. Beth loved shoes as much as Leliana, they truly were a match.
There stood Alfstanna, Fergus’ new wife and soon-to-be mother of his child. Irmiric having passed from his lyrium addiction which had been sad to see what had happened to the former Templar. Alfstanna had agreed to sell Waking Sea to Bann Wolff since he had lost everything during the blight; the man was soon to be remarried and hopefully he would beget new sons. Alfstanna had agreed, especially after the bandit attack had happened to Fergus, which Nate had stopped. Ser Oswyn from the Dragon’s Peak Bannorn – he would never inherit his father’s Bann being the second son and crippled. He was to become my new Seneschal of the Warden’s in Rivain.
Several elves were on board from Lanya’s clan and many from the Alienage from Denerim and the whole Elven clan from Highever. On the other ships that would dock the entire garrison of knights and soldiers from Highever and Gwaren would board with their families, those who wished to start a new life. Those that would have no ties left in Ferelden with so many that had died during the blight and the civil war. Other ships of castless and surface dwarves where boarding, wishing to start a new life with the Hero of Ferelden. There stood Ser Cullen, whom I had rescued from the Circle Tower when Sir Greagoir had left to fight in the Free Marches, along with his secret love from the tower a mage. So many others were watching and waiting for my answer. There were so many on several ships. Even several whores from the Pearl which was laughable, my soon-to-be-troubled husband wouldn’t find any comfort from them. Bella the serving wench from Lloyd’s Tavern in the town of Redcliffe Village, she would serve as my maid. All of these people waiting for my answer. All of them, looking to me to lead them in starting a new life far away from Ferelden. These people were broken just as I was, just as I had been since the night that Howe murdered my family and changed the destiny of my life forever.
The Queen turned around and saw her brother behind her. Standing next to him was the most precious of all that would go with her. She turned back around and addressed the Qunari warrior before her.
“Yes, Sten I’m ready to seek this path.”
Smiles and approval were seen all around.
“As you wish Kadan, let us go.”
Taravalia reached out and took her son’s hand and led him aboard Sten’s ship. The son, that Morrigan had sacrificed herself for to give to the Queen of Ferelden. Her son born with Morrigan’s heritage within his veins, a son that darkspawn could never taint because of her and Alistair being Grey Wardens. There had been two more chalices of blood, one drunk by a dark-haired witch of the wilds; the other chalice, full of Morrigan’s blood, drunk by the soon to be Queen of Ferelden. My son had been born with Morrigan’s abilities of magic, and the magic that had also come from Alistair’s true mother to fight Flemeth with in the future.
I would learn more of this ancient magic in Rivain. Dark magic, the Circle of Magi and the Chantry had forbidden to be taught to those under their charge. The black arts magic of illusions and possession which Morrigan and I had practiced that night at Redcliffe, before the army marched to Denerim. As Flemeth had once said, “we believe what we choose to believe.”
The magic practiced that night was to free Morrigan from Flemeth once and for all and allow me the opportunity to live so my son could be born and the price had been one night with Alistair for Morrigan. The Theirin bloodline had come from Maferath, the mortal husband of Andraste through the Alamarri and Chasind tribes. I still didn’t understand how Flemeth had captured Andraste’s soul and imprisoned the prophet’s soul within an Arch demon. I would never know. I had brought the child into the world that should have been born long ago though Andraste and Maferath before he had betrayed his own wife. The same that Alistair had planned to do to me. Our son would return to Ferelden one day as it’s true ruler.
Morrigan was the one who struck the killing blow to the Arch Demon, sending the Arch Demon’s soul to seek my child to be reborn into the world. What nobody ever knew was that Morrigan and I had switched bodies before we began that march to Denerim. I was in her body and she was in mine, done by the ancient black magic of possession. Alistair had been with Eamon and Teagan while I was gathering my equipment in my room before meeting all of them downstairs to begin our march. Morrigan and I had switched bodies at that time. Until the killing blow was struck, when Morrigan was the one who had actually died and I was returned to my own body. Morrigan had also been a Grey Warden and why Alistair had never been aware was still a mystery to me, when I had sensed the taint within her, this is why I had called her sister. For those on the roof of Fort Drakon that day it looked like I had taken the killing blow.
Morrigan was somewhere far beyond the fade, perhaps in the new Golden City itself. I had found her at the mirror where she had returned to see me. She had known that I needed answers. She had left me with instructions about my own son and his soul and what his destiny would be. She would guard him from the fade and I would guard him in life until his day came to do battle with Flemeth. I being with child had changed her plans after the Landsmeet. I didn’t realize that I was with child until she told me that I was.
I knew before I agreed to all of this, that Alistair would be changed forever after that one night and I had been right. He had thrown our love away, if he had ever loved me at all, and reveled in the knowledge that he could enjoy other women other than his future wife, changing our love for each other into hatred. I had also known before I ever stepped into his room that night he might come to hate me for agreeing to Morrigan’s plan and he had done so, hating me more and more as each year went by. I understood his hate but I couldn’t forgive him either, not for his part of the ritual, no never that. In his betrayal to have me killed.
I’ll pray to the Maker that Alistair never seeks me out for if he does, then it will be a duel to the death if we ever meet again, for I would be taking his son away. He might also search for Morrigan and the child he had been told would be conceived by her and him which should have happened. I hoped that he was wise enough to stay in Ferelden and be her King until the time for his calling came.
The calling which I would never seek being a woman, I will fall on my own blade when the time comes. I had decided to change this within the Wardens. How many female Grey Wardens might have been turned into a broodmother once they had gone to their calling? The thought will always haunt me until the end of my days. How had the order never known about this and if they did know why did they allow this to happen? It was evilness.
I had also known at the Landsmeet that Alistair would never agree for Loghain to become a Grey Warden which is what I had wanted and make Loghain take the killing blow as I would have commanded him to do. For me it was always about someone else and what they wanted.
I had done what my father asked and done my duty for Ferelden with mishaps along the way. The same promise I made to Cailan after the war council to protect Alistair. All I had ever asked for in return was loyalty. I had received it from the people who had truly loved me.
I had given my all to the man I had loved above all else and in the end it had all been for naught. He had never wished for me to rule beside him and be his wife and bear a child for him. I had bore him a child that he had never known about with the help from the Wardens and Varel at Vigil’s keep along with Morrigan and Anders.
My husband had never once come to visit me until I ordered Amaranthine burned after his first welcome visit, no letter, no acknowledgement of any kind. He had tossed me aside like I was trash beneath his feet. My Cousland blood was good enough to run all over Ferelden though. Never again would I shed anymore blood for this country or for it’s King on his behalf, nor would my brother or his wife.
The Qunari war ship made its way slowly out of Denerim’s harbor during the cold harshness of the black wind blown night. The Queen of Ferelden was standing at its bow proud and noble, as the ship carried the Hero of Ferelden into mist, legend, and time. With her golden eyed son on one side and her Mabari war hound on the other Taravalia went forth to meet her destiny.